Confirmation

Yes people. We now have confirmation that, under these layers upon layers of chunk, I do in fact have abdominal muscles. I was starting to think that with each pregnancy they just stretched and ultimately shredded, then dissolved. I was wrong. How do I know this? Because they scream bloody murder at me every time I move. Mostly I consider that a good thing. Re-introducing myself to my abs is good. Right?

Monday's boot camp was okay. Not super, but okay. My bandanna weighed it's usual 15lbs by the end (no glistening in my family, just good old-fashioned sweat) and the dips made my arms a little weak, but otherwise it was just "meh" to me.

Wednesday was a whole nuther ballgame though people. It kicked my arse properly. My legs aren't as sore as I thought they would be (those buttbuster things on the exercise ball... wowzah). But my abs... OOOOHHHHH my abs. We only did two ab exercises, as opposed to the eighty-thousand leg exercises. But the were certainly effective. I haven't done the whole yourpartnerpushesyourlegsdownandyoustopthemfromhittingthefloor thing since HS volleyball. I don't rememer it hurting this much back then. Hmm. I wonder why that is... ;) And the punching thing was good because you have to hold yourself up long enough to punch both sides. So overall, the best ab day yet. I was a little sore when I woke up today, but overall, not TOO bad.

And of course I went to Body Pump today. Because I'm smart like that. But seriously I love body pump. LOVE it. I like to lift weights. Besides a killer ab track that I'll talk about in a minute... during the tricep track we did pullovers. Which can be a great ab workout too! YIPPEE!!! On the first one, and I loaded up the bar thinking that I really wanted to get a killer ab workout (I *heart* pullovers), and I....... almost dropped the bar. Because my abs burned SO bad. HOLY mother. Oh my word. *insert appropriate swear words (is that an oxymoron?) here* And then, after the wimpering finally subsided, came the ab track at the end of the workout. We did some SSSLLLLLOOOOWWWWW bicycles. owowowowowowowow And then... it got better! We go to do something like what you do with an ab wheel, only we use the bar/weights to, yes, you guessed it... roll out then back in. It was super.

So I kind of took the rest of today off. There was one point this evening when someone needed something (it's hard to remember specifics when this is how you spend your time...) I was sitting (slouching) on the couch and, I kid you not, I almost didn't make it up. I had my arms OUT IN FRONT OF ME trying to will myself into a sitting position. I don't think I had that much trouble when I was 42 weeks preggo w/Isabel. My kids just kind of looked at me like I was some strange and unknown vegetable that had been plopped on their dinner plates.

Oh the joys of boot camp. But at least I have found my abdominals again after a long-estranged relationship. =)

Peace.

Total Disappointment

I'm a little disappointed by Monday's BC. Parts of it really stunk while doing it. But I think that that was mostly because of the excessively dry air. But as soon as I was done, I wasn't really tired anymore. And today there's not a single part of me that is sore. So I'm kind of disappointed.

Okay. I'm disappointed that I'm not sore. Maybe I need a mental evaluation...? ;)

The whole kicking the wall thing was a pain in the arse. Seriously. But I'm not really feeling it today.
The ab part kicked my butt, so my abs should be screaming every time I move. But they're not.

Rats.

And I'm guessing that BC is canceled tomorrow. I can promise you that I'm not hauling my tushy anywhere.

Thank goodness for shoveling, right? At least it's a workout. And it's out in the fresh air. And I can throw snow on my kids. And bury them. And laugh a lot. I really hope Dave doesn't have to work tomorrow. If he's home, I can leave Alex home with him and take Isabel and Nate sledding. Now THAT is the best way to spend a snow day.

Peace.

Boot Camp

My bloggy friends Jessica and Megan reminded me that I haven't blogged for quite some time. So maybe I'll post on my experiences during boot camp, too. Nothing like stealing an idea. ;) Though, to be honest, I feel like mine will be from a different angle than theirs.

A little back-story...
1. I actually LIKE to exercise. I am just having a hard time finding the time/motivation to get my fat ass moving.
2. Related to #1, I was actually certified as a personal trainer for a while. So I know a little sumthin sumthin about exercise.
3. As someone that was formerly somewhat athletic, being fat has probably been the most difficult thing I've ever dealt with.
4. I've been going to the Y semi-regularly for a couple of years now. Not that that has given me any sort of leg up with Boot Camp. I haven't actually gone regularly for about 6-9 mo. So I'm pretty out of shape.

So day #1 wasn't too bad. We did some basic fitness tests that we'll compare on the last day of boot camp. Hopefully we will all have improved. I opted to push myself pretty hard so that I have a better indication of whether I actually improved or not. We shall see. I'm not feeling overly optimistic at this point. I mean, seriously, my belly flops more than my 'girls'.

My upper body was semi-soreish on Tuesday. I have a love/hate relationship with that feeling. Love it because I know I actually USED my muscles. Hate it because it makes the most basic things, like scratching my back for crying out loud, burn like crazy.

Today's run was harder, I thought. All that blasted sprinting just about did me in. Cold weather+asthma+interval training= asthma attack. SUPER. But I wheezed my way along, secretly hoping the lead person would take pity on the rest of us and slow her ass down. And somehow I ended up with the leader chick right behind me. Greeaaaat. So when I'm in front, I can't slow it down to what can barely be called jogging. No. I have to keep freakin jogging for real. Awesome.

And then came the real joy of boot camp. I had kind of planned on the whole running thing. Otherwise, I wasn't really sure what to expect. The whole progressive thing bit. Totally. I hate pushups. Of course that was the thing we did the most of. Don't really like dips either. But I did them (not with my legs straight though. SHH! Don't tell Jessica. Please. I'm begging. Don't tell her.) But the one thing that I really truely loathe with all of my being is burpies. SER-I-OUS-LY. I can see no physical benifit to burpies. I hated them in Jr/Sr High when I was actually in awesome shape (and looked damn good, I might add) And I hate them even more now as a fatty. Do you know what a burpie is? Well, just in case, I should tell you. You really need a visual, though, to get the full effect.

How to do a burpie:
1. Jump in the air w/ your arms up.
2. Land.
3. Squat down.
4. Shoot your legs out behind you to a pushup position.
5. Bring your legs back in.
*repeat*

Now here's the thing. I can do 1-4 okay. Some people have issues with #2, but we don't judge at boot camp. ;) It's #5 where I run into problems. I feel like my 1yo when he's standing back up after falling down. I never seem to make it back into that proper squat position. Instead, my legs are apart and only somewhat bent. And my ass is sticking way up in the air. Awesome. Really really awesome. Can't wait to do it again.

And I have one more word for you: CHAFING. My fat thighs rub together so much that it's starting to hurt! Okay. TMI. But that's the fun of boot camp. =D

Starting weight for BC: 175. Yuck. Ick. Blech.
Time to bring that baby down a bit.

Peace.

Again...

About a year and a half ago, my mother's brother took his own life. Yesterday, my dad's brother did the same.

I did not know either uncle well.

This uncle was a friend of mine on Facebook. However, I'm pretty sure that in the months of our 'friendship' there that I didn't even send him a note to say hi. How incredibly sad is that? I'm so very disappointed in myself for that. He suffered from a great depression (I guess we could say that's a given in this case) but I didn't take the time to let him know that I cared, even though I didn't really know much about him. And I can't go back and fix it.

The part that makes me angry with this is his wife. She has been intending to kick him out of the house (and not for the first time). She has sent emails to his siblings trying to find somewhere for him to go. He hasn't had a job for a few years. His wife apparently was constantly making fun of him for it. That's helpful. The last job he had... she made fun of it. I'm sure at some point he thought to himself that he should maybe seek help. I wouldn't be the least bit surprised if the main reason he didn't was because SHE WOULD HAVE MADE FUN OF HIM for doing it.

Now, I'm not trying to say that all of the blame lays at her feet. Obviously it all really starts with him. Depression is just so hard to overcome, even more so when you don't have a solid support system. And let's face it. That's part of being married. I don't care if you aren't in love anymore or whatever. You still have an obligation and responsibility to be supportive. My dad kept in contact with him... calls, birthday cards, etc. It was very one-sided, but he still did it. But that's just not enough for someone so deep in depression.

I really would like to be like my dad in that way. To keep in touch, even if the other person doesn't really. It says a lot about him, I think. But that's just how my dad is. He has never, and I'm sure will never, held a grudge. He's friendly and respectful to everyone he meets. If they had lived closer, I'm sure my dad would have made every effort to include him in the things he was doing and just finding time to do things together. But when you're hundreds of miles apart, it's kind of tough.

*sigh*

I'm sorry, Uncle D. for not doing my part to let you know you had family to lean on. I will miss you.

This week...

will be VERY interesting. I'm curious to see how it will end. The beginning... some good and some bad. So we will see.

Right now Nathan is snuggled up watching tv while I wait to see if his fever will spike again after the IB wears off. Alex has a low grade fever, too. But he's sleeping so I haven't had a chance to take his temp. again. Rats. Isabel seems fine so far. Though of course she has a 4 day weekend coming, so she has plenty of time to catch whatever the boys have. Super.

I'm being smart (well, compared to usual anyway) and I've started a log of their illnesses. If it gets worse, I'm happy that I'll be able to tell a nurse/dr. exactly what's been going on. Though seriously, getting a 4yo boy to answer questions is a little difficult. Here's our convo from earlier:

Me: "Are you hot?"
Nate: "Yeah. Just a little hot."
Me: "or are you cold?"
Nate: "I'm really cold."
Me: "Or are you just right?" (hopeful here)
Nate: "I'm hot. And a little cold."

Veeeeerrrry helpful. Sheesh. And I don't even know how to go about asking him if he's achy. He'll just say yes in some way, shape, or form no matter what the question is. Crazy kid.

But here's the good news of the week: I went for a run last night! I was out for about 20-25 min. and I ran the WHOLE TIME. I was very proud of that. I haven't run regularly since senior year of HS. I'm planning on going again tonight. And Thurs and Fri. Woot! Maybe even this weekend.

Sadly, though, I was supposed to go for 2 MNOs this week, and won't be going to either. That makes me sad. But that's life. The running more than makes up for it. =D

Coupons!

So of course I have clipped coupons in the past. Who hasn't? It's so exciting to see the pile building and thinking about saving all that money just makes you feel good. But today was different. Today, my friends, I USED those coupons. I not only remembered to grab the stack, but I went through them to see which ones were relevant for this shopping trip, took them with me, and remembered to use them at checkout.

I know what you're thinking. But I have actually gone to the trouble of getting them to the store and completely forgot to use them. And most of the time I just plain forget to grab them in the first place. Plus, the whole situation intimidates me. I tend to be very self-conscious anyway, so when I'm trying something that I am not 100% positive on how to do it, I get a little freaked out. Even the little things like WHEN to hand the coupons to the cashier get me all flustered. (seriously, this is how I am with everything) Plus, I'm just a very forgetful person.

So this was a very big deal for me today. Conquering fears, big or little, and bad habits like forgetting things, are such great things. It doesn't happen often, but I will take any little victory I can get. =)

Yay me.

Long Day

What a looooooong day people. Seriously. The end was especially fun.

Nate wet his pants. Great. He was in the bathroom, just didn't make it the rest of the way I guess. *rolling eyes* He did that a couple days ago, too. So now I'm on to having to give him a consequence the next time. A big one. (Nate also spent the entire morning having breakdowns any time he didn't like what he heard. We almost didn't get to go somewhere fun this evening, but the afternoon was a bit better. A bit.)

But wait. It gets better.

As I was putting Alex in the bath, and settling down on the very comfy floor to read my book (yes, I'm that bad of a mother. I read while my not-yet-1yo takes a bath. So shoot me.) Anyway, as I sit down I notice something on the cabinet next to the toilet. Hmm. That looks an awful lot like marker. On the wood is a picture of a very fancy halloween pumpkin. Directly above the picture, on the edge of the counter top is "by Isabel." The only silver lining I can see is that at least THAT part will come off.

I

Was (and still am)

LIVID

I sent her to sit on the couch until I cooled off enough to speak to her. While I did so, I did my usual inventory of what her favorite things are. A very essential piece of information when it comes to giving a child a consequence, I might add. *if you really want to throw them off, ask them nicely in the middle of a 'bad choices' conversation what their favorite things are. it's fun.* The only toy out in their room at that time was her barbies. JACKPOT!

My words to her exactly: "Isabel, come here please." *shuffle shuffle* "I want you to go to your room, pack up your barbies, put them in my room then go sit back on the couch." *insert tears streaming down cheeks here* But she did it.

I should NOT have to remind my 6yo that the ONLY thing we write/color on is paper. Really. I shouldn't have to. *sigh* I also shouldn't have to remind my 4yo to hold it until his pants are down and the lid is up. *bleepity bleep bleep bleep*

Now, when is SNL going to realize that kenan thompson is NOT funny and plays every character in the exact same way?