Again...

About a year and a half ago, my mother's brother took his own life. Yesterday, my dad's brother did the same.

I did not know either uncle well.

This uncle was a friend of mine on Facebook. However, I'm pretty sure that in the months of our 'friendship' there that I didn't even send him a note to say hi. How incredibly sad is that? I'm so very disappointed in myself for that. He suffered from a great depression (I guess we could say that's a given in this case) but I didn't take the time to let him know that I cared, even though I didn't really know much about him. And I can't go back and fix it.

The part that makes me angry with this is his wife. She has been intending to kick him out of the house (and not for the first time). She has sent emails to his siblings trying to find somewhere for him to go. He hasn't had a job for a few years. His wife apparently was constantly making fun of him for it. That's helpful. The last job he had... she made fun of it. I'm sure at some point he thought to himself that he should maybe seek help. I wouldn't be the least bit surprised if the main reason he didn't was because SHE WOULD HAVE MADE FUN OF HIM for doing it.

Now, I'm not trying to say that all of the blame lays at her feet. Obviously it all really starts with him. Depression is just so hard to overcome, even more so when you don't have a solid support system. And let's face it. That's part of being married. I don't care if you aren't in love anymore or whatever. You still have an obligation and responsibility to be supportive. My dad kept in contact with him... calls, birthday cards, etc. It was very one-sided, but he still did it. But that's just not enough for someone so deep in depression.

I really would like to be like my dad in that way. To keep in touch, even if the other person doesn't really. It says a lot about him, I think. But that's just how my dad is. He has never, and I'm sure will never, held a grudge. He's friendly and respectful to everyone he meets. If they had lived closer, I'm sure my dad would have made every effort to include him in the things he was doing and just finding time to do things together. But when you're hundreds of miles apart, it's kind of tough.

*sigh*

I'm sorry, Uncle D. for not doing my part to let you know you had family to lean on. I will miss you.

This week...

will be VERY interesting. I'm curious to see how it will end. The beginning... some good and some bad. So we will see.

Right now Nathan is snuggled up watching tv while I wait to see if his fever will spike again after the IB wears off. Alex has a low grade fever, too. But he's sleeping so I haven't had a chance to take his temp. again. Rats. Isabel seems fine so far. Though of course she has a 4 day weekend coming, so she has plenty of time to catch whatever the boys have. Super.

I'm being smart (well, compared to usual anyway) and I've started a log of their illnesses. If it gets worse, I'm happy that I'll be able to tell a nurse/dr. exactly what's been going on. Though seriously, getting a 4yo boy to answer questions is a little difficult. Here's our convo from earlier:

Me: "Are you hot?"
Nate: "Yeah. Just a little hot."
Me: "or are you cold?"
Nate: "I'm really cold."
Me: "Or are you just right?" (hopeful here)
Nate: "I'm hot. And a little cold."

Veeeeerrrry helpful. Sheesh. And I don't even know how to go about asking him if he's achy. He'll just say yes in some way, shape, or form no matter what the question is. Crazy kid.

But here's the good news of the week: I went for a run last night! I was out for about 20-25 min. and I ran the WHOLE TIME. I was very proud of that. I haven't run regularly since senior year of HS. I'm planning on going again tonight. And Thurs and Fri. Woot! Maybe even this weekend.

Sadly, though, I was supposed to go for 2 MNOs this week, and won't be going to either. That makes me sad. But that's life. The running more than makes up for it. =D

Coupons!

So of course I have clipped coupons in the past. Who hasn't? It's so exciting to see the pile building and thinking about saving all that money just makes you feel good. But today was different. Today, my friends, I USED those coupons. I not only remembered to grab the stack, but I went through them to see which ones were relevant for this shopping trip, took them with me, and remembered to use them at checkout.

I know what you're thinking. But I have actually gone to the trouble of getting them to the store and completely forgot to use them. And most of the time I just plain forget to grab them in the first place. Plus, the whole situation intimidates me. I tend to be very self-conscious anyway, so when I'm trying something that I am not 100% positive on how to do it, I get a little freaked out. Even the little things like WHEN to hand the coupons to the cashier get me all flustered. (seriously, this is how I am with everything) Plus, I'm just a very forgetful person.

So this was a very big deal for me today. Conquering fears, big or little, and bad habits like forgetting things, are such great things. It doesn't happen often, but I will take any little victory I can get. =)

Yay me.

Long Day

What a looooooong day people. Seriously. The end was especially fun.

Nate wet his pants. Great. He was in the bathroom, just didn't make it the rest of the way I guess. *rolling eyes* He did that a couple days ago, too. So now I'm on to having to give him a consequence the next time. A big one. (Nate also spent the entire morning having breakdowns any time he didn't like what he heard. We almost didn't get to go somewhere fun this evening, but the afternoon was a bit better. A bit.)

But wait. It gets better.

As I was putting Alex in the bath, and settling down on the very comfy floor to read my book (yes, I'm that bad of a mother. I read while my not-yet-1yo takes a bath. So shoot me.) Anyway, as I sit down I notice something on the cabinet next to the toilet. Hmm. That looks an awful lot like marker. On the wood is a picture of a very fancy halloween pumpkin. Directly above the picture, on the edge of the counter top is "by Isabel." The only silver lining I can see is that at least THAT part will come off.

I

Was (and still am)

LIVID

I sent her to sit on the couch until I cooled off enough to speak to her. While I did so, I did my usual inventory of what her favorite things are. A very essential piece of information when it comes to giving a child a consequence, I might add. *if you really want to throw them off, ask them nicely in the middle of a 'bad choices' conversation what their favorite things are. it's fun.* The only toy out in their room at that time was her barbies. JACKPOT!

My words to her exactly: "Isabel, come here please." *shuffle shuffle* "I want you to go to your room, pack up your barbies, put them in my room then go sit back on the couch." *insert tears streaming down cheeks here* But she did it.

I should NOT have to remind my 6yo that the ONLY thing we write/color on is paper. Really. I shouldn't have to. *sigh* I also shouldn't have to remind my 4yo to hold it until his pants are down and the lid is up. *bleepity bleep bleep bleep*

Now, when is SNL going to realize that kenan thompson is NOT funny and plays every character in the exact same way?

Traits I have passed on...

I can't help but notice the traits that I have unknowingly passed on to my children. With some of them, I can't help but wonder why God would decide these traits are worth passing on, but I'm sure He has his reasons... ;)

Isabel has inherited my ability to completely ignore the world around her. She can walk around completely unconcerned with what people might be thinking, lost in her own super-fun world made up of only things that make her happy and content. I was exactly like that as a child (okay, so maybe I am still a little oblivious to the world around me) ***Funny story: When I was about Isabel's age, I went running into our house crying because everyone had gone inside without me. I had been out there, by myself in my own little world, for more than an hour after the others left. That explains a lot, doesn't it?*** She has a very goofy sense of humor, that quite often only she understands. Oh, and have I mentioned her very short temper? Though I'm sure that one comes from Dave... right?

Nathan is umm, well... competitive, though that doesn't quite cover it. I am veeeeeery competitive. VERY. And we both love all sports. Fortunatly, Nathan is even more athletically inclined than I ever was, and I did okay. I mean, I did get a few offers to play softball in college.

And poor Alex inherited my laziness. Seriously. Granted we ARE both 3rd children, which does explain some of it. But we were playing the "so big" game. He loves it, as most kids do. But he's so lazy he does it with one hand. *rolling eyes* Seriously. And he has only in the last couple of weeks (he's almost one people) been able to drink out of a sippy cup on his own. He wouldn't even pick it up for the longest time, and then when he did he wouldn't tip it. Isabel could drink out of one on her own when she was like 6 mo. at the LATEST. Lazy dude. Lazy. I am curious to see what else he has inherited from me, though it may be a while.

Sadly, not one of them has inherited my left-handedness. I had hopes for Alex, but they're getting squashed more by the day. *sigh*

Wordless Wednesday

Yay!

I have my computer back! Woot woot!!! I just can't seem to stay on top of things when Dave takes my computer. And this time it was for 5 full days, leading into a weekend, when I don't really use it anyway. So it really threw me off dudes. So it feels very happy to have it back. =)

So let's see. What did we do while he was gone? A whole lotta nuthin. ;) We had dinner our friend's house. That was fun. I got to coach soccer Sat. morning. That was an experience. I get to do it again this weekend, and I'm pretty excited. Though hopefully my foot will be feeling better by then. (I hurt it TWO weeks ago and it isn't the slightest bit better. Yuck!)

Oh, and later on Sat. I decided to hit the 6 hour sale at hyvee. Yeah. With three kids. OH. MY. WORD. Never again, my friends. Never again. They behaved extremely well, though. I don't think I had any threats to hand out. And while I was happy to get a gallon of milk for $.99, it was sooooooo not worth it! There's really no experience like stalking a fellow shopper out to their vehicle in the hopes that you can relieve them of their cart. But we lived through it. And I remembered just about everything that was and was not on our list! Sweet.

Now on to choosing a heating company to replace our furnace. Super. I just love spending boatloads of money that I'm pretty sure we don't have. Very fun. But alas, we cannot be blowing CO2 into our house, so it must be done. Yippee! It's extra fun when one of the companies refuses to talk to me because I'm the 'little woman' Yup. They've been calling Dave at work to talk to him, which he doesn't have time for. Seriously people. I promise that I have a head attatched about a foot above my boobs. Pinky promise.